Words by Porpe
Photos and Captions by Rob Meronek

It wasn't the only double kickflip that went down, but it was the cleanest. Jimmy Carlin takes the tech to the double set with a double flip

Lamonzo Coleman aka Easy-E on one of those tricks that's easier switch than regular. Switch frontside big spin

Those shoes that Tim Thomas is nollie backside heelflipping in have just arrived here at SPoT, but you can't buy them online. Let go of the mouse and get your ass in the Shop

Jimmy Carlin - frontside flip

My favorite "Who dat?" of the weekend was this dude - Nick Tucker. He's got inward heels on lock. This one is switch to switch manny. Skateboard critics might call out the small touchdown, but that's what you get in a contest with a trick this hard

My five frames per second camera is not fast enough to document certain tricks. Big flip is one of them. Andrew Pott took it to the rail

Wanna get a song stuck in your head? Okay: I see your head lights, they lookin dead nice. They got me sayin d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-damn!!!

If I had a company in the sketchy skateboard industry, I'd take a much closer look at backing Justin Cefai to help me take all you kiddies' lunch money in exchange for skateboard goods. This dude rips, is always smiling, isn't all weird and quiet, etc. Check this sequence for a lesson in how to catch a fakie flip out of a switch nose manual

Indy heelflips are the tech bennihannas. It's a pretty foul move on skateboard, in my opinion. Don't be fooled by this rollerblade-ish move though, Adrian Gephart killed it. This just happened to be the only usable photo I got of him

All the hurricanes are on the east coast except for this one Chris Troy is doing

Chris Troy - stale fish crooked grind

Damn, Louie Lopez couldn't make this back smith frontside 180 out in time. Take a Poop

Since there were so many unknown dudes in this event, I had to quickly jot down a quick note on each as they checked in. There was one note I wrote down as "tye dye shirt, beanie, could be a serial murderer" next to someone named Kevin Jones. I assume that's this dude doing a frontside bluntslide. Shortly after this, someone's board smashed into my camera and destroyed the main lens I use. That's a $1,700 boo boo. Rad

Sometimes the best business advice is to just go out of business. Lots of people at ASR need to take that advice

Pacific Drive was the winning shop. Look at Adrian Gephart. He's got a "indy heelflip" gang symbol. I wonder what the bennihanna gang symbol is?

We didn't really have time to do anything on Saturday night since we took the red-eye back home after the Contest. After a quick dinner with our friend Filmer Travis, we were at the airport. Travis is picking up and moving to Barcelona to make it happen, plus post up with some Euro chick he met. Good luck with that. See you next year, Travis

An overnight red-eye flight is the only time you get to see normal middle class society passed out on benches sleeping like the bums on the street they normally pass by. We should give these guys cardboard signs that say, "Will cook the books for next month's BMW payment," or "Please help, can't keep up with the Jones'"

Converse is trying to come in hot to the skate shoe market. One way to start is to have a cool guy party with an open bar and a band people want to see. Then, let the cool guys smoke indoors. John Montesi joined the smoking section with me

The Converse party was at House of Blues. Thanks for the sauce and food. Good luck in the sketchy skateboard industry, Converse

Boosh is one of the best drunks I know. Anthony Papallardo is helping Converse make a dent in the sketchy skateboard industry. I think Boosh probably punched a hole in this oil painting of him before the night ended

I ran into the white slasher. She was making out with Vanessa Torres. How does a girl that skates have such high maintenance finger nails like that?

Willy Santos supports smoking indoors in California

Let's put a Converse in a foot fetish. I guess those are coming out later this year

Maybe they could have got less homosexual bartenders at House of Blues

Remember that Transworld cover with Nick Trapasso doing the 5-0 across the water rail? He was wearing Converse. Let's do a foot fetish, Nick

It's always a pleasure to throw back some sauce with the twin brothers from different mothers - Blair Alley and DJ Wade

I can't even remember the last time I smoked before getting to California. I sort of accidentally quit. Smoking indoors just because is a great reason to re-start

I like watching Schaefer put in work on the ladies. Rob Brink is taking notes

Nike SB doesn't have a dental plan. Luda Crooks don't care

Open bar all night and an unpacked Social Distortion show? Wow, thanks Converse

I heard Porpe throw out this line after giving out his busines card: "Search Porpe on the site and you can see me skate." I don't think it worked. Beer goggles were definitely on right here anyway

Way way back in the day, my sister got it on with Clint Peterson

Skatepark of Tampa Party Team was all over the place this weekend. That's Oliver and a foot fetish with his canvas Mid's

Now I'm back at the show taking random photos of stuff to make fun of. These girls are having a bad hair day on purpose

Body did the Create a Skate thing. I don't think Professor Schmitt is hyped on his shape

Abdias Rivera's twin went pro for Foundation. I'll say in about another year or so, I'll be taking a photo of Angel Ramirez wearing an Abdias Rivera shirt

The Skatepark of Tampa Party Team can be found everywhere from the streets to the bars to the ramps. Braydon can't wait to get his drunken turtle tat

Don't be fooled by Danny Tumia looking like the nerdiest dude out. He kills it on the trannies when he's not doing calculus

Chicken suits, gorrilla suits, hot dog stand service, free corn dogs, undercover alcohol, and Geoff Rowley decorating. Must be the Volcom booth

I put a note in my calendar so I can confirm my prediction of this company being out of business by the next ASR show

Neal Hendrix has the task of finding eye candy for the Fuel TV segments he's doing all weekend. An energy drink company booth is a good place to find some

Child abuse, southern California style

I like hip hop. I like Terry Kennedy. Both together, not so sure

Remember Ron Allen? Yeah that's because you're not 65 like me

Wow, how bummed is Dennis Busenitz at this dude looking like him going around dressed like that

Some kid named Aldrian Garcia jumped 40 inches and won $1,500 in a high ollie contest put on by DC and Grind for Life

Wow, the Donger entered the High Ollie Contest. How long has he been repping that double tail whip thing?

I'm guessing these are the parents of the baby with the mohawk. Welcome to So Cal, bra

This dude is jamming out some Hawaiian music. Welcome to ASR

I returned to the mini-ramp to find Schaefer risking his life once again just for the sake of entertaining the crowd. On the next try, he rolled away clean from this egg plant. This bail photo is way better, though

I thought I was being lame going to bed at like 10pm, but when I returned to the room, I found Body passed out with all kinds of random stuff around him. My excuse was having to wake up at the butt crack of dawn for Battle of the Shops today. Body's excuse was too much apple

Frequent flyer miles keep adding up which means First Class upgrades on the regular. That was a great airline meal with plenty of free sauce and Ironman on the boob tube. Thanks, Delta

Gonzo flew with me but unfortunately, he got stuck back in Poverty Class with the rest of the commoners. I passed a beer back to him. I think I spent just as much time in the plane pisser as I did in my seat with all that sauce flowing

Body and Porpe are my roommates for the weekend. They ain't skeered to spoon

If you need a badge to get in, Schaefer's got you

That's Adam from Transworld Skate Business. There's a Skatebook shindig tonight with a bunch of Bart Simpson prints of him killing it at famous skate spots. Looks like he's kickflippping Wallenberg there. ABD by Gerwer, dude. Adam did a video interview with me just now at the show. I can't get it to play from where I'm at. I'm sure I look like a tool ending it shirtless

That's the tech section of the Battle of the Shops Contest going down on Saturday

Porpe made another new friend at the show, then she took his board and started doing tricks he can't even do

Probably the most action Prope's wood is going to see from a girl all weekend. I like the all white angel suit

The theme at the Volcom booth this year has something to do with hot dog stands. That's Jake the ATM with the BTM front boarding the rail in his frankfurter get-up

Remember Paul Schmitt's Create-A-Skate Program? I went and did that today. You get to learn all about how a board is made and then make one yourself. Professor Schmitt's got a math calculation for everything. First step, measure your height to see what wheelbase you should be riding

Then the Professor breaks down all the measurements of a board, what they mean, and how they can affect your ollies and nollies. You then pick your nose, tail, and width you want for your board and set them on your template. I also learned that about 150 boards can be made from one maple tree. About 8,000 trees are cut down a year to produce the 1.2 million decks from the wood factory a year. The trees are between 40 and 80 years old and are growing back faster than they are being cut down. Settle down, hippies

It's been a long time since I've done caveman math like this. I chose to make an 8.75 width cruiser board

There are lots of nose and tail shape templates you can trace from or you can pick your own. I chose to use the Hosoi Hammerhead tail as both the nose and the tail and ended up with a nice dog bone template

After you get your template, line up the truck holes, trace your shape onto the slab, then you're ready to saw it up

This is what an uncut skateboard deck looks like. It's off to the buzz saw. Everytime I hear the word uncut, I think of a Euro anteater style uncut penis

The Professor snapped this photo of the first and last time I am ever going to use power tools. This is where you cut your shape out

Next, you sand down the rough spots, then The Professor rounds off the edges for you since that's a step that a lot of people ruin their deck on

The last bit of sanding is done on these racks with finer sand paper. I guess I'm the only one that chose a wacky shape

The last step is to pick your graphic. Mine is a hand drawn masterpiece

The first day of ASR was filled with welcomes, hellos, and nice-to-meet-yous. There were three mini-ramp demos that took place. First demo is open to all. Second and third demo is open to top am and pros only. Here are a few highlights from the first day:

• Noel from Cons – what a sight for sore eyes, a blind man can notice this girl’s sex appeal
• Bill Weiss – he was putting on an impressive display of skill on the entire ramp. Too bad he could not pull the full cab to tail on the vert extension, the crowd really wanted to see it
• Tony Magnusson and Dave Hackett – it was nice to see the over forty crew being able to hold their own on the ramp
• Andrew Langi – fresh from winning three g’s at Thrasher’s Bust or Bail Contest in San Francisco, to putting on a show at the mini-ramp in San Diego. Vern you definitely did sleep on this kid. Switch front blunt on the vert extension. WTF?
• Chad Bartie – if he skates like he was skating this past weekend he might be taking Volcom’s Ramp Jam next week at Surf Expo. The nollie nose grind from low to high every try was ridiculous

When the demos weren’t going on there was still plenty to do. IASC was showing a film titled Underskatement Vol. 4 at their booth. The video consisted of different sections displaying a wide range of cinematography. The three parts of the video that stand out are “Fix Pushers,” a “documentary” on a group of mongo pushers, the short piece on Og, a Brazilian skater who suffered from polio as a child and now skates with his hands, and Bobby Worrest’s “Behind the Grip Tape,” yet another “documentary” on Bobby’s accomplishments off the board. If you have not seen it, check it out – it’s worth every second of your time.

That first night of ASR was the Converse “Re-Release” Party and their re-attempt to get into the skate shoe business. Remember when they tried to get into the skate industry back in 2000/2001 with that one helium shoe that you never bought? Well it seems that this second time around they’re doing it right with a legit line of shoes and a pretty ill team. Their line consists of shoes from the past and not from the future and it looks like it is really going to work out for them. With a team of Anthony Pappalardo, Ethan Fowler, and from the rumors circulating around this weekend, Nick Trapasso, they really can’t go wrong. Oh yeah, and the Party was a blast with free food, open bar all night, and an acoustic set from Social Distortion.

The second day of ASR was more of the same. There were three more mini-ramp demos with the same guys in there doing the same tricks, but all in all very entertaining to watch. Two things did stand out. First, Duane Peters skated the ramp with no mercy and Brian Schaefer did an eggplant via Vern’s request with a board that was not his, while a crowd of two hundred people screamed his name. Schaefer loves the attention. Remember the semi-wasted back tail in a caveman get-up and sandals he did at Volcom’s Ramp Jam a couple years back?

Our final day at ASR was all about Automatic’s 5th Annual Battle of the Shops. 23 shops pick their best guys to battle it out on four different obstacles. Each shop picks out five guys assigning one dude to each obstacle and picking one guy as an alternate just in case of injury or serious case of blowing it. Here is what went down:

The obstacle consisted of a manny pad/box that was connected to a bank-to-bank manny pad, which was connected to a double sided step-up with a ledge to the side of it that was connected to another bank. My description sucks, so look at Rob’s photo for a better idea of the obstacle. The riders got 30-minutes to land their best tricks:

• 3rd – $200 – Street Machine – Nick Tucker – this kid was killing it with Joey Brezinski-type tricks. He did an inward heel flip manny 360 flip out
• 2nd – $300 – ZJ – Justin Cefai – the judges were looking for those who were skating all the obstacles and this kid did just that. His frontside half cab nose manny up the wedge to nollie half-cab switch manny down got him his well deserved 2nd place finish
• 1st – $500 – Val Surf – Justin Schulte – he was killing the entire obstacle and barely squeezed by to get the 1st place finish by .33 of a point

It was a four-flat-four with just enough room to run, throw your board down, and toss yourself down. They gave the 23 riders a 30-minute jam and it was on:

• 3rd – $200 – Pacific Drive – Adrian Gephart – he must have done something good to beat John Dickson’s early destruction of the set to have gotten him 3rd place, but can anyone recall his tricks?
• 2nd – $300 – Surf Ride – Tim Thomas – this dude was smooth as ice and was throwing down a variety of tricks. His switch 360 flip was off the hook
• 1st – $500 – Street Machine – Jimmy Carlin – has anyone ever seen someone land so many tricks down a set in one session? A well-deserved 1st place for Jimmy

It was on the mini-ramp. To keep it organized the tranny section was broken down to two heats with an intro skate-‘til-you-fall run. Each group got 15-minutes:

• 3rd – $200 – Momentum – Curren Caples – a crowd favorite and always fun to watch. You can tell that during practice he was holding back because when the Contest started his airs were twice as high
• 2nd – $300 – Active – David Loy – with his staple tricks such as lien-to-tails on the vert extension and tweaked out stalefish grabs, this young man is a force to be reckoned with. The nosegrind from low to high on the a-frame box was absolutely ridiculous
• 1st – $500 – Santa Cruz – Josh Mattson – it was a three-peat for Mattson and his last name says it all…MAD-son. He was skating out there like he had something to prove and took out his only competition in his heat, Cameo Wilson. While Cameo was skating the vert extension, Madson flies out of nowhere and they both went down with Madson’s board hitting Cameo right in the kidney. Watch out if your're skating a ramp with this guy

They save the best for last, making the rail the most action-packed part of the whole Contest. It was a 30-minute jam and here is what went down.

• 3rd – $200 – Pharmacy – Marquise Preston – he probably did more tricks than anyone on the rail, but was lacking the on the difficulty which explains his 3rd place finish
• 2nd – $300 – Ninestar – Andrew Pott – no doubt that Pott absolutely destroyed the Contest. Every trick he did was flip-in and his “Nyjah Houston” (big flip front board to fakie) was insane
• 1st – $500 – Pacific Drive – Andrew Elliott – he threw down a big bag of tricks including a pop shuv-it fs 5-0 and a kickflip front board shuv which landed him the 1st place spot

The judges added up the place standings for all the shops and whoever had the lowest points won. Don’t ask me to explain this…you can take it up with head-judge Jason Rothmeyer:

• 3rd – $1000 – Active – Theotis Beasley got 10th, John Dickson got 4th, David Loy got 2nd, and Justin “Figgy” Figueroa got 4th, giving them a total of 20 points
• 2nd – $1500 – Pharmacy – Keelan Dadd got 4th, Joshua Grossguth got 7th, Cameo Wilson got 4th, and Marquise Preston got 3rd, giving them a total of 18 points
• 1st – $4000 – Pacific Drive – Anthony Williams got 6th, Adrian Gephart got 3rd, Adrian Mallory got 5th, and Andrew Eilliot got 1st, giving them a total of 15 points

Thank you to the ASR staff for making everyone feel welcomed. Big thanks to all the skate companies who make ASR an event to come to year in and year out…without you there would be no ASR. And finally thanks to Automatic Mag and all of the sponsors for supporting yet another great Contest. See everyone again in January.

Porpe